Pumpkin Vine is a Circle of Hell

I don't know how many circles of hell there are supposed to be, I've never read Dante's "Inferno". I don't recall ever reading about levels of hell in the Bible either, so I doubt that they are for real. But if there are, one of them has to be full of Wyoming weather.

Pumpkin Vine is the highest point in Wyoming on Highway 287 between Laramie and Ft. Collins, CO. I had to go down that way this morning, and I am constantly amazed at how that entire stretch of a few miles seems to be in another dimension all together. The roads were wet as you left Laramie, but by the time you arrived at Pumpkin Vine, there was snow and slush all over the place. The wind was blowing so hard the snow was falling sideways. The clouds were so low they seemed to be touching the ground. Lightning flashed, thunder rumbled, the cow from "Twister" blew by and wait, are those the 4 Horses of the Apocalypse? Well, maybe I exaggerate a little, but my point is the weather is always so much worse up there it's ridiculous. On the other side, as you rolled into Colorado, the sun came out and the roads were completely dry and there was no evidence of snow anywhere. Bill and I have noticed recently that the "Wyoming Welcomes You" sign is mysteriously missing. Perhaps because Wyoming isn't so welcoming during the winter and even spring. I am so over Wyoming winters! Forget Punxsatawney Phil. He has obviously never been to this part of the country, where spring doesn't arrive until late June.

On another note, during this same trip I was listening to the Christian radio station KLOVE. Now, all you Messiah people, (you know who you are) let's not get into a discussion of the CCM scene, ok? There are quite a few songs I appreciate and enjoy on the KLOVE, and it's beneficial to the soul, I believe, to listen to some "positive and encouraging" music from time to time. (What, Rage Against the Machine isn't uplifting??? Could've fooled me!) But there is plenty of not so good, I daresay just plain awful Christian music out there as well, and I happened to hear one of those songs on the road to hell, I mean, Wyoming. The Newsboys have a few pretty decent songs and a lot of questionable ones ("Breakfast in Hell", anyone?). But one of the stupidest, most inane ones is "Wherever We Go". I don't know if you've heard it, but it's worth listening to simply for they "Huh?" factor. As in "Huh? What the heck are they talking about?" They are saying things like "Wherever we go bees behave, squirrels up in the trees smile and wave, the ozone layer shows improvement, " blah blah blah, HUH??? What exactly are they trying to say? I think it must be something along the lines of the idea that because they are spreading the Good News of the Gospel, good things happen wherever they go. That's great, but did you have to say that in such a LAME way? It made me think of another stupid song by the Hooters, an 80's band that I actually like for the most part. I don't know if you've ever heard "All You Zombies", but again, it's worth a listen but you have to really listen to the words. Because lyrics aside, it's a decent song, I actually have it on my ipod. But listen to this, it's from the second verse: "Holy Moses on the mountain, High above the golden calf, Went to get the 1o commandments, Yeah he's just gonna break 'em in half!" I am not kidding. This is not a Christian group nor a Christian song--what the heck are they singing about??? Honestly, some musicians must look back on some of their lyrics and cringe. (Hello Bono--"well tonight, thank God it's them instead of you!")

Another aside--I seem to be heading out of my winter doldrums spiritually. Yes, I am entering the springtime of my faith (cue the sappy music, animated birds and blooming flowers). I think winter just really drags me down in more ways than one. God has used a great Garrison Keillor column on religious skepticism, among other things, to draw me out of the funk I've been in. Try to find it somewhere, it's a really good one. It was in the Denver paper last Wednesday or Thursday. I also must give kudos to my preacher friends passionate Easter sermon on the resurrection. Although I was only half-listening due to chasing my one year old around the back of the sanctuary, his fired up preaching definitely was an encouragement. I thought we were going to hear some righteous cussin' there for a while, Matt! But it's all good. If I can just get away from this godforsaken wind and the snow that keeps coming back, maybe I'll get my head straightened out, at least for a little while.

Peace out homeys!